THERE WAS A YOUNG LADY CALLED HOPE

THERE WAS A YOUNG LADY CALLED HOPE
WHO TRIED TO LOOK YOUNG USING SOAP.
WHEN HER SKIN LOOKED QUITE OLD,
SHE RECALLED WHAT SHE'D BEEN TOLD,
THAT HER BEAUTY WAS ONLY SKIN DOPE!!

Aurthers Limericks

A STAGE STRUCK TEENAGER NAMED HUGH

A STAGE STRUCK TEENAGER NAMED HUGH
TOOK NIGHT CLASSES TO LEARN SOME KUNG FU.
HE SAID "YOU WILL SEE
I'M A SECOND BRUCE LEE"
HIS PARENTS SAID "A SECOND BRUCE WHO?"

Aurthers Limericks

I KNEW A YOUNG GIRL CALLED ELAINE

I KNEW A YOUNG GIRL CALLED ELAINE
WHO SPENT HER EARLY YEARS IN DEEP PAIN.
"MY NAME IS OLD FASHIONED,
I WANT SOMETHING PASSIONED,
I WANT TO GET CHRISTENED AGAIN"

Aurthers Limericks

THERE IS A YOUNG LADY NAMED ROSE

THERE IS A YOUNG LADY NAMED ROSE
WHO HAS MUSIC WHEREVER SHE GOES.
EVERY HOUR OF THE DAY
AT HER WORK, HOME AND PLAY,
HER WALKMAN KEEPS HER TAPPING HER TOES!!

Aurthers Limericks

The Maynooth Limerick Song

Reid Wilson & His So-Called Friends- The Dirty Limerick Song

The Limerick Song

There was two back-country geezers

There was two back-country geezers

Who got porcupine quills up their sneezers

They sat beak to beak

For more than a week

Working over each other with tweezers

Brownielocks.com

There was a lady named Sue

There was a lady named Sue

Who had nothing whatever to do

And who did it so badly

I thought she would gladly

Have stopped before she was through

Brownielocks.com

There was a young housewife from Des Plaines,

There was a young housewife from Des Plaines,
Who was playing with the family's Great Dane,
She said to her daughter,
'Bring a bucket of water,
I'm afraid that we're hung up again

Extremely Funny

An elderly roue named Clyde

An elderly roue named Clyde
Took an an eighteen year old as a bride
They took the old lecher
Out on a stretcher
But as he left he was smiling with pride

Extremely Funny

There once was a consumer named Phil

Submitted By: Pat Bents

There once was a consumer named Phil
Who really wanted to kill
A sly young vendor
Who mad him a big spender
And gave him a very large bill.

Loony Limericks

There was a young lady one fall

Submitted By: Bob

There was a young lady one fall
Who wore a newspaper dress to a ball.
The dress caught fire
And burned her entire
Front page, sporting section and all.

Loony Limericks





There one was a man from Peru,

Submitted By: LAURA BLACK

There one was a man from Peru,
Who dreamed of eating his shoe,
he awoke with a fright,
in the middle of the night,
and found that his dream had come true!

Loony Limericks

There was a young woman named Bright

(author unknown)There was a young woman named Bright
Whose speed was much faster than light.
She set out one day
In a relative way,
And returned on the previous night.

Loony Limericks

In a castle that had a deep moat

Submitted By: Merriam
In a castle that had a deep moat
Lived a chicken a duck and a goat.
They wanted to go out
And wander about
But all they needed was a boat.

Loony Limericks